Hummer bhajan

Ever since he got the money to join the Mumbai Indians for the IPL, Harbhajan has been singing praise to the legendary off roader, Hummer. But, his fetish goes a little longer than the cool three crore rupees he pocketed at the auction. Reports say that he rode in one when he was in Australia prior to the IPL season when India won the CB Tri Series. This was when he actually fell in love with this King Kong of cars...yeah, it can scale neat angles too. And recently, he has actually managed to procure one; which drove into the news for the wrong reasons, again. He was challaned by the Punjab Police for driving without proper registration.

Quite a colouful figure, Harbhajan is not new to controversies. The 'Turbanator' as he is called, created the biggest furore when he took off is turban for a advert for the liquor major, Royal Stag. But by then, the off-spinner was quite used to being in a spot, under the spotlight; his debut into international cricket itself was beset with investigations into the legality of his bowling action. The 'Sreesanth slapgate' would have been a minor irk like swatting a persistent fly...

While Reel Wheel dissects the choice of cars of movie stars, at times we do take the off-road, side road and the road less travelled to talk about the choices of other people also. They don't necessarily have to be making a widespread impression with their decisions. The idea is to develop a healthy discussion / debate as to what kind of cars suit best any personality trait or character. This could even help you decide better while choosing your own set of wheels.

The world over, if you care to take a glimpse of those who drive the Hummer, you can see they are far removed from what Bhajji really is. Take the most famous among them, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Do I have to tell you anything about Arnie? Now, THAT would be a sight: a Hummer comes to a stop and Hulk comes striding out. Ok, we can't always expect a seven times Mr Olympia winner to emerge out of a Hummer. But at least a strapping six-footer? If not biceps that suffocate the tee shirt, some muscle? Some attitude and not a scowl? At least some serious fashion sense?

When it comes to 'real world' purchase as opposed to characters on cinema, we have to factor in more than mere personality traits when it comes to car purchases (esp. when we are talking about a 'close-to-a-crore' buy!). Now, what would Harbhajan have wanted in a vehicle that made him buy a Hummer? He will need space to carry around his training gear, of course. And say space to ferry a few team mates from the training or the match ground to the nearest watering hole or shopping mall depending on whether they won or lost or lost or won. Factor in the roads. If we stopped here, you might suggest a Bolero or a Scorpio, a Safari or a Xylo. But throw in an attitude for good measure. And don't forget the serious money we have to burn.

While the Toyota Land Cruiser or the Prado could have been in contention, they don't have the snob value. These are refined statements - no need to be flashy as we are not the nouveau riche. 'An unorthodox bowler' with an 'aggressive attitude' could be the only claim to a 'Hummer personality'. But take a close look at Bhajji and you are tempted to think 'soft spoken, mild mannered, gentle, warm, big-hearted, open minded, generous... ' So even the Hilux won't be the choice, nor the FJ Cruiser as they reek some major 'don't damn' attitude. And the other practical considerations make us zero in on the Sequoia.

Here is a spacious monster that stands out from the crowd due to its sheer physicality of presence, a powerful demeanour and makes a quiet impression. Very much like Bhajji's looks the Sequoia doesn't shouts 'Hey, Look AT Me'. But once it gets to do the talking, then you are rapt attention, held in enthrall and there are no two ways, but to be taken seriously. If the Hummer hollers 'Don't mess with me, keep away' from a mile away, the Sequoia says 'Come near me at your own peril'. It is like a powerful force from within, it intimidates you into leaving it alone.

What you got to say for yourself, about yourself, without saying it is a call you only have to make.